Well ladies and gentlemen it's that time of the year where I reflect on the of 2017 in movies and we see what films made me want to stop doing the blog all together and some where I wanted to punch someone in the face. Out of the 121 films I've seen this year, these films have the honor of being torn apart and never to be heard of again. With that being said I'm going to bring you my top 10 least favorite films of 2017 and the reasons why I hated each film and why they are on my list. So without further ado...
Dishonorable Mentions:
10. Rings
The Ring is easily one of the best horror films of all-time and it's sequel just completely trashes that entire mythos. So you'd think that a film that comes out 12 years after the awful sequel would give the filmmakers time to come up with a clever story that builds upon what the first film did. Instead we get another garbage horror film that follows the same beats as previous horror films and fails to be anything different. In a year where we've had a lot of stellar horror films like Split, Get Out and It, this is a film that stands out as the worst horror film of 2017.
9. Flatliners
Ok so the original film may not be as great as some people would think, but it did present a very interesting concept that done inn the right way could be something special. This film now had a shot to really make the concept something special with advancements in technology and with more people paying attention to detail. However this film takes the concept, changes eveything up and makes the film a horror film that just doesn't work. You bring back Kiefer Sutherland from the original film and you put him in an entirely different role when he could've been the one to help guide them along their journey as they try to replicate what the first film did. Look I agree it's ok to be different, but the film changed everything and nothing about this is special. This is a film you yourself may flatline while watching the film.
8. Kidnap
Halle Berry is a phenomenal actress and an Oscar winning actress at that, but she has been in a lot of really terrible film and you can add this one to the list. She was in a film a couple of years ago called The Call where she had to save someone who had just been kidnapped. In this film she is a mother trying track down her son who has been kidnapped. So you can see she's trying to do the same film with a couple of minor changes and it just doesn't work. The way everything plays out in the film is utterly stupid and doesn't male a whole lot of sense of paper. It's a film that follows the same beat points as other action thrillers and as a whole the film just doesn't work.
7. Geostorm
Over the years there have been a lot of really terrible films, but some of those films have redeeming qualities to where you know how bad it is,but you keep watching it. With the premise presented in Geostorm, you'd think you might have the same thing, but in reality it's a film that you never want to watch again. Director Dean Devlin is a guy who produced a lot of Roland Emmerich films so you can see where he gets the disaster chops at, but being that this is his directorial debut, it probably wasn't a safe choice to go back to the well and try to make a film you incapable of making. The visual effects look like they were done in Photoshop and look as bad as some of the bad action films from the 1990's and it's just a film that might be the dumbest film ever made.
6. Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul
This is a franchise that is intended for kids and in the first film you sent a precedent going forward for who your target audience is going to be and when building a franchise you need to try to keep the cast together to help build characters and let the target audience grow up with them. However this film decided it was time for a completely new cast in hope of rejuvenating the franchise and at its core it forgot who the film was going to be for. Much like another film later on in the list, it tries to appeal to audience by making the main plot point to meet internet stars and really those aren't appealing and haven't been for a long time. It's a film that just fails on so many levels and it's something that basically has killed a franchise.
5. Sleepless
Seeing Jamie Foxx in a cop thriller is something a lot of people would want to see especially when it's based off of a well received novel. However the film just becomes you basic action film with nothing to truly get you excited and all of the action scenes are done the same way over and over again and often drag on fro way too long and never find a way to end. The film has a cast that includes Michelle Monaghan , Scoot McNairy and David Harbour all of which are great actors who have nothing to do in the film whatsoever. Jamie Foxx also sleepwalks through the film and you never really see any true emotion out of him to help you connect better with him. Action films are becoming a mockery when films like this come out and follow the same paths other films do and lack any originality.
4. The Nut Job 2
The first film in this franchise was nothing special, but this film got made simply because the first film made just enough money for the studio to make a sequel. However this film is just as bad as the first film if not worse than the first film and it just really doesn't work as a theatrically released film. The film would've worked better had it been sent straight to DVD. The animation is awful and the jokes are just way too childish even for children and nothing about the film works at all in a year where animation wasn't really that strong this year.
3. Fifty Shades Darker
Ok look you all know how much I hate this franchise, but I will admit that the first film while overall it is a bad film, there are some redeeming qualities that if the source material was a little better, the film could've worked. The same cannot be said about this film in any way, shape or form and it's one of the most unbearable films to watch. The craziest thing about this film is that E.L. James hated the first film because it didn't follow here vision (which actually made the film better), but she had the director and writer fired from the film and instead decided her husband should be the one to write the film and that's not gonna turn out bad is it now. The film has no direction whatsoever and you can tell that both Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan look so uncomfortable in the film with every line of dialogue. Honestly I'm glad that they aren't splitting the last film into two parts because this franchise needs to die immediately and thankfully we'll get our wish next year.
2. CHiPs
Where to begin with this film. Let's be honest, the television show isn't' all that great to begin with and a film based off a pretty terrible television show just doesn't seem like it's going to work from the start. Not only does Dax Shepard star in the film, but he also wrote and directed the film so everything falls back on him and this isn't a good look for him going forward. Michael Pena feels out of place in the film and I know Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell are married, but she doesn't need to be in the film she doesn't belong in the film and is a forced love interest. If your a fan of the television show then you'll probably be really disappointed that this feels nothing like the television show and it almost feels like a spoof comedy.
1. The Emoji Movie
Whoever came up with this idea needs to be fired immediately. Look the film isn't meant for and it never was meant for me, but the fact of the matter is that adults are going to have to see this film because of their kids and you have to at least give them something to like about the film and there isn't anything for them. The film teaches a lot of lessons that kids should never be taught and it's a film that tries to appeal to all types of people with material that isn't even relevant anymore. None of the jokes work in the film and the story is a complete rip-off of Wreck it Ralph. Nothing about this film is appealing and it should never been seen by human eyes for the rest of eternity.
So ladies and gentlemen what are some of your least favorite films of 2017 and what do you think of my list? Let me know in the comments section below and let your voice be heard.
Jonah Sparks
Dishonorable Mentions:
- Father Figures
- Resident Evil: The Final Chapter
- The Bye Bye Man
- Underworld: Blood Wars
- Snatched
- Suburbucaon
- Unforgettable
- The House
- xXx: The Return of Xander Cage
- All Eyez on Me
10. Rings
The Ring is easily one of the best horror films of all-time and it's sequel just completely trashes that entire mythos. So you'd think that a film that comes out 12 years after the awful sequel would give the filmmakers time to come up with a clever story that builds upon what the first film did. Instead we get another garbage horror film that follows the same beats as previous horror films and fails to be anything different. In a year where we've had a lot of stellar horror films like Split, Get Out and It, this is a film that stands out as the worst horror film of 2017.
9. Flatliners
Ok so the original film may not be as great as some people would think, but it did present a very interesting concept that done inn the right way could be something special. This film now had a shot to really make the concept something special with advancements in technology and with more people paying attention to detail. However this film takes the concept, changes eveything up and makes the film a horror film that just doesn't work. You bring back Kiefer Sutherland from the original film and you put him in an entirely different role when he could've been the one to help guide them along their journey as they try to replicate what the first film did. Look I agree it's ok to be different, but the film changed everything and nothing about this is special. This is a film you yourself may flatline while watching the film.
8. Kidnap
Halle Berry is a phenomenal actress and an Oscar winning actress at that, but she has been in a lot of really terrible film and you can add this one to the list. She was in a film a couple of years ago called The Call where she had to save someone who had just been kidnapped. In this film she is a mother trying track down her son who has been kidnapped. So you can see she's trying to do the same film with a couple of minor changes and it just doesn't work. The way everything plays out in the film is utterly stupid and doesn't male a whole lot of sense of paper. It's a film that follows the same beat points as other action thrillers and as a whole the film just doesn't work.
7. Geostorm
Over the years there have been a lot of really terrible films, but some of those films have redeeming qualities to where you know how bad it is,but you keep watching it. With the premise presented in Geostorm, you'd think you might have the same thing, but in reality it's a film that you never want to watch again. Director Dean Devlin is a guy who produced a lot of Roland Emmerich films so you can see where he gets the disaster chops at, but being that this is his directorial debut, it probably wasn't a safe choice to go back to the well and try to make a film you incapable of making. The visual effects look like they were done in Photoshop and look as bad as some of the bad action films from the 1990's and it's just a film that might be the dumbest film ever made.
6. Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul
This is a franchise that is intended for kids and in the first film you sent a precedent going forward for who your target audience is going to be and when building a franchise you need to try to keep the cast together to help build characters and let the target audience grow up with them. However this film decided it was time for a completely new cast in hope of rejuvenating the franchise and at its core it forgot who the film was going to be for. Much like another film later on in the list, it tries to appeal to audience by making the main plot point to meet internet stars and really those aren't appealing and haven't been for a long time. It's a film that just fails on so many levels and it's something that basically has killed a franchise.
5. Sleepless
Seeing Jamie Foxx in a cop thriller is something a lot of people would want to see especially when it's based off of a well received novel. However the film just becomes you basic action film with nothing to truly get you excited and all of the action scenes are done the same way over and over again and often drag on fro way too long and never find a way to end. The film has a cast that includes Michelle Monaghan , Scoot McNairy and David Harbour all of which are great actors who have nothing to do in the film whatsoever. Jamie Foxx also sleepwalks through the film and you never really see any true emotion out of him to help you connect better with him. Action films are becoming a mockery when films like this come out and follow the same paths other films do and lack any originality.
4. The Nut Job 2
The first film in this franchise was nothing special, but this film got made simply because the first film made just enough money for the studio to make a sequel. However this film is just as bad as the first film if not worse than the first film and it just really doesn't work as a theatrically released film. The film would've worked better had it been sent straight to DVD. The animation is awful and the jokes are just way too childish even for children and nothing about the film works at all in a year where animation wasn't really that strong this year.
3. Fifty Shades Darker
Ok look you all know how much I hate this franchise, but I will admit that the first film while overall it is a bad film, there are some redeeming qualities that if the source material was a little better, the film could've worked. The same cannot be said about this film in any way, shape or form and it's one of the most unbearable films to watch. The craziest thing about this film is that E.L. James hated the first film because it didn't follow here vision (which actually made the film better), but she had the director and writer fired from the film and instead decided her husband should be the one to write the film and that's not gonna turn out bad is it now. The film has no direction whatsoever and you can tell that both Dakota Johnson and Jamie Dornan look so uncomfortable in the film with every line of dialogue. Honestly I'm glad that they aren't splitting the last film into two parts because this franchise needs to die immediately and thankfully we'll get our wish next year.
2. CHiPs
Where to begin with this film. Let's be honest, the television show isn't' all that great to begin with and a film based off a pretty terrible television show just doesn't seem like it's going to work from the start. Not only does Dax Shepard star in the film, but he also wrote and directed the film so everything falls back on him and this isn't a good look for him going forward. Michael Pena feels out of place in the film and I know Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell are married, but she doesn't need to be in the film she doesn't belong in the film and is a forced love interest. If your a fan of the television show then you'll probably be really disappointed that this feels nothing like the television show and it almost feels like a spoof comedy.
1. The Emoji Movie
Whoever came up with this idea needs to be fired immediately. Look the film isn't meant for and it never was meant for me, but the fact of the matter is that adults are going to have to see this film because of their kids and you have to at least give them something to like about the film and there isn't anything for them. The film teaches a lot of lessons that kids should never be taught and it's a film that tries to appeal to all types of people with material that isn't even relevant anymore. None of the jokes work in the film and the story is a complete rip-off of Wreck it Ralph. Nothing about this film is appealing and it should never been seen by human eyes for the rest of eternity.
So ladies and gentlemen what are some of your least favorite films of 2017 and what do you think of my list? Let me know in the comments section below and let your voice be heard.
Jonah Sparks
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